Can You Separate Reality from Video Games?

I can. But maybe that’s because I’m a normal human. I don’t understand these people who think that because they play video games, they can go on killing sprees, stealing their parents’ car and running it into a convenience store. Even Helen Keller wasn’t that dumb. 

For all of those “concerned parents” (read: cunts) who think that violent video games turn is all into mindless blood-thirsty killers, take a look at yourself. Yeah, when you were little Indiana Jones movies made you want to go on adventures but this is different. Chances are, if you’ve raised your kid in a normal household they can tell that a video game is just that. They can put down the controller and be back in real life a second later. Yeah, they might act out fantasies or things they saw in the game with their action figures but fuck, let the kid’s imagination wander. Just because he’s being creative doesn’t mean that he’s going to kill his grandparents, stuff them in the trunk of a car and drive it off of a dock. Give your kids some credit and give yourself some god damned credit for raising them right. (That’s assuming you did. And you probably didn’t but that’s neither here nor there.)

If someone tells me that I shouldn’t play Grand Theft Auto because it’s going to turn me into a violent person who thinks it’s acceptable to carjack old women and beat up black people on the street, I’ll tell them this: If you make that argument then you have to also make the argument that playing Madden will make me more athletic, that playing Guitar Hero will make me better at guitar. I’ve played Madden and my catching never got better out on the fields with my friends. I played Guitar Hero but that didn’t replace guitar lessons. Yeah my fingers got faster but I didn’t sell out Madison Square Garden 3 weeks later to serenade thousands of lovely ladies with my songs. Grand Theft Auto doesn’t make you violent. Bad, dumb parenting does.

But hey, if the other side is true, if video games really do influence us more than we think, if there’s some kind of apocalyptic alien invasion, don’t bother calling the army. We’ll be on top of it.